Here, courtesy of Mr. Brian Powers, is an ongoing list of Last Names that are Present-Tense Verbs. It is indeed “worth a laugh or two”, as Brian wrote—and many of these names belong to actual people.
Britney Spears fish in the river.
George Wendt that way.
George Burns things in the basement.
Jamila Squires for Sir Lancelot.
Brian Powers the electrical grid by sheer will alone.
Heather Mills corn for the whole village.
Justin Rose and left without saying goodbye.
Camilla Parker Bowles 270 on a good day.
Lyn Faulds Wood—but it usually breaks.
Buster Rhymes with luster.
Mark Spitz watermelon seeds at ants.
Santa Claus his way to the top.
Gordon Banks on the fact that you don’t have a loaded gun.
Bill Withers if you don’t water him.
John Waters the marigolds with red bull (but forgot to water Bill!).
Tom Waits for the right moment to strike.
Jeremy Irons his clothes on Tuesdays.
Ben Folds Jeremy’s clothes after they’ve been ironed.
Edgar Rice Burroughs through the dirt.
Pierre Spies for the girls’ team; don’t trust him.